Canada & Christmas

My grandmother passed away on December 16th, 2009 – This was also our third year wedding anniversary.  The last time I remember seeing her was at our wedding in 2006.  It’s hard to lose anyone during this time of year, but it’s even harder for me to think of our wedding anniversary AND Christmas without thinking about her.

I didn’t know my grandmother very well.  She lived with my family for about a year before moving to Canada to live with my Aunt and her family.  Her language of choice was Cantonese and mine was English, so it made communication a challenge.  I learned a great deal about her after she passed though.  Not sure how I feel about that.

Our original holiday plans this year was supposed to start with Christian, his sister Stefania, our dog Lily, and I hopping into the CR-V on Sunday morning the week before Christmas to spend Sunday-Saturday with their parents in Santa Barbara.  With my grandmother’s passing, we couldn’t move forward with that plan since I needed to head to Canada with the rest of my family to pay our respects.  Christian and Stefania ended up staying home a few extra days to wait until I returned before heading down to Santa Barbara.  Bless their hearts for doing that (and their parents’ hearts for being so understanding) because a single one-way flight down there to meet them would have cost me about $250.  EEEK. 

I flew from San Jose to Seattle, Washington at 6:30 AM Monday morning with Mom, Dad, Uncle Bao, his wife, his daughter Annie, my Aunt Linh, her husband, and her kids Cathleen and Colin.  They had booked my flight separately so I ended up in first class on my own.  That was my first experience in first class and let me tell you, it was niiiice.  The seats were so roomy that my feet couldn’t touch the floor when I sat all the way back.  My tea came in a glass mug; I had maybe 3 or 4 refills during the 2-hour flight.  I was even offered a Bearclaw for breakfast (I turned it down in an effort to make healthy choices during this trip).  If you ever have a long flight, first class is the way to go.

Once we landed in Seattle, we had a few hours to wait before our flight to Bellingham, WA.  The family wanted breakfast so we stopped at a Wolfgang Puck Express and ordered a bunch of breakfast pizzas (bacon & ham).  They looked DELICIOUS, but I went for a yogurt instead.    We saw Santa fly by on a golf cart during the meal so I took the kids (and my mom) to see him and take some photos. 

Breakfast Pizzas

Cousins

Mom w/Santa & the Elf

The flight to Bellingham was a short mayyybe 45-minute flight.  I sat next to an audio engineer who works on major awards shows (she was wearing a 73rd Annual Academy Awards jacket, so I had to ask), so I chatted it up with her for a while.  She was a super-nice lady who is building a house to settle into in Bellingham. 

Once we arrived in Bellingham, my Uncle Sen (who lives in Abbotsford near or in Vancouver – Grandma had been living with my Aunt, Uncle, and cousin there since the late ‘90s) picked us up from the airport and we all loaded in to head up to his place.  We made a quick stop at the cemetery where my Grandmother was going to be buried in Lynden, Washington – not far from the Canada/US Border.  They were digging the grave when we got there.  Next to the grave they were digging was my Uncle Huy Quyen’s grave.  It was all very strange.  I didn’t think about seeing his grave when we went up there, so it caught me off guard.  He died in a tragic lumber mill accident in 1996 – very sad because he went way before his time.
 

Uncle Huy Quyen’s Grave

Once Uncle Sen was done talking business with the grave digger dude (I don’t know what you call those guys), we made our way up past the border and to his mansion of a house in Abbotsford.  That place is BEAUTIFUL.  9 rooms.  A bajillion bathrooms. Huge.

My Aunt Anh was prepping a feast of a dinner when we arrived.  Turkey with veggies, asian-style. 

Turkey Dinner – Asian Style

After we ate, we all headed to the funeral home for a viewing/memorial at the funeral home.  When we got there, my Aunt Linh had already arrived separately and she was standing before her mother’s open casket bawling her eyes out.  She was so torn and emotionally wrecked, she couldn’t even stand.  It was heartbreaking to watch.  I spent most of the evening staring at my Grandmother from the front row of seats in the hall.  I think it was the first time I’d ever seen a dead person, so it was a very surreal, very trippy experience.  As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t really know her very well, but to see all of the people that came to her memorial and wept for her passing, it gave me a whole new insight into who she had become to this community.  She was very active in her church and her senior community group.  Everyone there was very touched and affected by her and they were all very devastated that she was gone.  I remember one older gentleman who walked in – someone I didn’t know – walked up to her casket, took off his hat, and just about had a meltdown.  Loud sobbing, tears streaming down his face – it was really sad to watch. 

The funeral the next morning wasn’t any easier to bear, but that’s where I learned the most about the person she was to these people.  She was baptized and became an active member of her church.  She made homemade mooncakes for everyone every year during the moon festival.  She became a happy person.  That wasn’t the person I remembered, but I was so glad to hear that it was the person she transformed into.  I mourned the loss of opportunity to know this happy person that my grandmother became and through everyone who was at the funeral, including my family who flew up with me from the states, I mourned the loss of her.  I shed my first tear during this event after our family had to line up as part of the receiving line at the end of the funeral and we paid our respects one last time before they closed the casket.  My Aunt Linh went ballistic – she fell to the ground and had what was probably the biggest cry of her life.  My mom lost it.  She had to sit herself down to try and catch her breath.  My Uncle Bao started crying.  Even my dad, who was completely stoic during this entire trip, shed his tears for her.  So THAT’s when I teared up.  All of her children and grandchildren were gathered around her crying one last cry for her passing.  It was heavy.

After the funeral, we drove past the border behind the Hearse to the Lynden Cemetery in Washington.  We paid our last respects and watched the casket get lowered and grave get filled.  It was all surreal, I tell you. 

Once the burial was done, we made a pit stop at McDonald’s and then headed for the airport.  It was a LOT of work for me to be the only fluent English speaker on this trip… my goodness.  I was so happy to be home once my aunt dropped me off.  It was such a tiring experience and the first leg of my traveling was finally over.

Christian, Stefania, Lily and I all went down the Santa Barbara the next day and spent Christmas with their family.  Christian, Lily, and I made our way back home again on Sunday and then I got really, really sick and had to log on to work the next day.

I’m currently nursing my Christmas cold (Thanks, Santa.  Really, you shouldn’t have) and am longing for my next day off (Thursday).  Here’s hoping 2010 brings better and happier memories.

Thanks to those who made it allllllllll the way down to this point in my blog.  Hope you all enjoy a safe and wonderful New Year’s. 

Post Thanksgiving Update

Okay, so it is REALLY post Thanksgiving… by about 2 weeks post… I’ve been busy. Don’t judge.

We found Dottie a home the day before we left for Santa Barbara. She has gone to the home of a fellow Yahoo and we’re confident that she’s happy.

I ate too much unhealthy food during the Thanksgiving holiday and now feel a bit blimpy. I went for a run with Christian over the weekend to get back into the workout routine and was ready to die.  I’m still sore.  Back to Thanksgiving though, I made this little guy for Christian’s mom:

Isn’t he cute?  He sat next to the real turkey on the Thanksgiving buffet piano (yes, you read piano).

We took Lily to the beach on Thanksgiving Day and she went nuts. She LOVED it – even got into a little bit of trouble:

Loving the beach

Getting into trouble


Christian trying to get her out of trouble

That was exciting.

We took some family pictures of our friends, the Gibson Family, the day after we got back from Santa Barbara.  Here are a few fun ones that I took:

Lily Gibson is such a cutie patootie.   I love it!

Once we got back to work, I worked feverishly to organize last minute details for a surprise baby shower for a co-worker (Geneva).  Never let me throw a surprise party again.

Geneva surprised – we actually got her!

Here’s the diaper cake I made for the party:

As for the rest of December, we have a department function tomorrow night, a play on Thursday, a canned food drive contest at work in which we’re both competing, some parties sprinkled here and there, and back to Santa Barbara we go.

Tired.